


Commander, Commander

by SelenaKent



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Character name spelled Hanji, F/M, Spoilers for chapter 84
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-29
Updated: 2016-12-29
Packaged: 2018-09-13 05:43:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 859
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9109093
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SelenaKent/pseuds/SelenaKent
Summary: Hanji knows the moment Erwin is hurt.  Or rather, she feels it.It hits her in the chest, a deep piercing pain that knocks the wind out of her and nearly forces her to her knees.





	

Hanji knows the moment Erwin is hurt. 

 

Or rather, she feels it.

 

It hits her in the chest, a deep piercing pain that knocks the wind out of her and nearly forces her to her knees. 

 

She clutches at her heart, a million thoughts and prayers running through her mind as she shoots her anchors into the side of the well and hauls herself up. 

 

There's a burned body at the top of it, right arm outstretched towards the opening, towards her, and she feels the hot tears swell in her eyes as she stares at Moblit's charred face. She remembers the split second it took for him to push her out of the way into the well, and how she had looked back into his eyes and saw the flames and steam engulf him before blackness surrounded her. 

 

And now there he was, her brave and loyal Moblit lying in front of her, still and silent, so unlike himself. Fat tears roll down her cheeks as she grips at the right side of his jacket, the only part that hasn't been eaten away by the heat. Moblit was her partner in crime, her other half, the closest she had ever come to a soul mate. And there he was, charred and dead, all for the sake of her. She doesn't know what to do, knows she can't take give him the burial he deserves, so she rips off his patch, tucking it securely in her pocket before the throbbing pain in her chest intensifies and has her gasping for breath.

 

She begs for Moblit's forgiveness as she leaves.

 

She thinks her ribs are cracked, the side of her head is throbbing, she can't see out of her left eye and her wrist aches but the only thing she can think of his him.

 

_Erwin_

_Erwin_

_Erwin_

_Please don't let me be too late._

 

She thinks that, for a moment, her heart stops when she sees Erwin's prone body next to Levi's knees on the rooftop, bloody, bruised, and beaten and she feels bile rise up her throat at the sight of him.

 

She vaguely knows what's going on, why everyone is shouting, but then she pieces it together: the serum, his injuries, Bertolt.

 

_We can save him._

 

And suddenly she hates Mikasa and Eren because they're willing to sacrifice Erwin for their (young, talented, fearless) friend and she has never hated anything more in her life, not the titans or the shifters or even herself. 

 

So she restrains Mikasa instead of running to Erwin's side because they'll be enough time for that once Levi injects him and he lives. She'll be damned if she lets the girl takes away the last bit of light ~~she~~  humanity has. 

 

Mikasa is strong, so so strong for a child but Hanji has never been one for mercy or restraint and she is filled with too much rage and hope to do anything but hold the damn girl down like an animal.

 

But then Levi relents. And Hanji hates him, too. And it dawns on her that Erwin will die, here, outside of the walls, because they failed. She wishes she could've showed him the ocean. She wishes she could've given him the answers he wanted. She wishes she could save him. 

 

But Erwin didn't put his life in her hands. He put it, the most precious and sacred thing in her life, in the hands of Levi. And Levi had made his choice. 

 

She yells then, at Levi, at Eren, at everyone as she runs to Erwin. Levi tells her to let him go, that Erwin is exhausted --but dammit so is she, and how dare he leave her alone in this, in this fight, in this world. How dare he abandon her. 

 

All Erwin had left her was the fate of humanity. A bolo tie and the lives of everyone except for his.

 

She clutches at Erwin's lapels, then runs one of her bloody and trembling hands over his face as the other applies pressure to his wound, trying to buy him more time, buy them more time. She opens her mouth, ready to yell for Moblit to bring her bandages, when the reality hits her once again. 

 

Moblit is dead.

 

Erwin is dying.

 

And her chest feels as if it is going to explode. 

 

_She loves him, she loves him, she loves him._

 

The love of her life is dying in front of her, and all she can do is watch. She rakes her eyes over his handsome, broken face, kisses his forehead, his cheek, his lips. She sobs into his mouth when she feels him kiss her back. 

 

She knows that Armin is being given a second chance right then, can see Levi inject the serum and hears the thunder of his transformation, but all she can focus on is him, his eyes which have opened and bite into her. 

 

"Erwin, please..."

 

He clutches her hand, so big and strong, but in that moment she wishes he hadn't touched her at all.

 

"Hanji...you are...hope."

 

Erwin Smith dies in Hanji's arms. 

 

And with him goes her humanity. 

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, I know that this isn't exactly how it happened in the manga, but this is how my poor shipper heart saw it :(


End file.
